For my fellow white women feeling hurt & confused

Commented in response to a post in one of my women’s groups expressing hurt & confusion about the blue bracelet thing:

What may feel like hate and division, is actually constructive critique and an opportunity and necessity for us to evolve in our understanding.

I know a lot of us white women are feeling confused right now. The best advice I can offer is to follow Black women who are feminist and anti-racist educators.

Are you on TikTok? If so, you are welcome to friend me. Most of the videos I repost are from Black women who are feminist anti-racist educators.

If you’re not on TikTok, there’s a book called Hood Feminism, by Dr. Mikki Kendall. This book answers a lot of the questions and confusion I’m seeing from you and other fellow white women in this group.

There are many other books as well. We can and will totally get on the same page!! But we have some learning to do. There are so many resources out there to help us catch up.

You are welcome to friend me on Facebook if you like as well.

PS. One of the characteristics of “whiteness” is a fear of and aversion to confrontation. So we shy away from it. And therein lies a lot of our problems. Because then anytime we try to talk straight with each other it sounds like punishment or hate. We can overcome this conditioning. It’s sort of like exercising a muscle. Also, awareness is key.

One educator I’ve learned a lot from is Desiree B Stephens. She’s on TikTok and also has a substack. Things I used to take personally, I realize are just a part of our cultural programming and can be changed. This is a big part of our work!